Bah.

Aug. 12th, 2012 11:56 pm
margotvankapelle: (adulthood)
Been feeling very "meh" lately.  I can't tell if it's just that the seasons are changing and my brain is trying to catch up or what.

*sigh*  I keep torturing myself by looking at adoption agency websites.  Yes, I'm a masochist.

I miss Pennsic.

Um, other than that, I might actually have to crack open my nursing book and start studying.  I got a 90% on my last test, which is still an A but just barely.  I want to make the Dean's List every quarter, I think on one hand to prove something to myself and to others, and on the other, I think it would be nice to have some sort of bragging rights, you know?  To show that I'm not a total failure at school, never mind that I keep starting and failing to graduate through some muckup or other. 

Oh hell, I don't know.

Um. Well.

Jul. 30th, 2012 03:57 pm
margotvankapelle: (sun)
We went through this house today.  It's a couple of blocks from Boe's school; we can see the roof of the school building from one of the back bedrooms.  It's also in an "urban renewal" zone, which tends to be code for "crime tends to be high", but in looking at the statistics, this little area is a growing oasis of lower crime rates than elsewhere in the zip code.  There are crazy amounts of tax exemptions and credits one can claim as well as some of the lowest housing costs in the city.

Let's face it:  Is it possible to have brand-new stick built construction anywhere else in the entire flipping United States for less than $90,000?  Yeah, didn't think so.  Besides, it is just the architecture that Boe and I really like and he fell in love with the place as soon as he walked in the door. 

  This house (and its companion house at 2412 Gay St.) have sat empty for the past 4 years; they were originally closer to $130,000 but then the housing market went to crap and basically everyone lost interest in buying real estate.  So the nonprofit group that owns these properties is making down payment assistance available as well as very favorable lending terms through a partnership with the Urban League.

So we've applied to be considered for the house at 2416 Gay.  We'll see if they approve us; the worst they can say is "no".
margotvankapelle: (reading)
Somehow, I managed to make it onto the Dean's List for 2 quarters in a row!

5 more to go...

Also, I've had a hankering to try just a weensie bit harder to not look like Exhausta McHaglike.  So I picked up some lip gloss.  I dunno...we'll see. Lord knows since I single-handedly keep Chapstick in business it's just as easy to smear on some lip gloss instead.  Maybe eventually I'll get to the point of wearing makeup again on a regular basis.  I know, I know, it only takes a few minutes, etc., etc.,  I'll look a lot better with makeup on, more self-confidence blah blah blah.  As a fat chick, I feel more secure feeling invisible.  But wanting to feel invisible and yet wishing I wasn't makes for a heavy makeup addiction, even if I never wear the stuff.  One might argue that the makeup addiction is worse for never wearing the stuff.  So like I said, it's easiest to start off with lip gloss and see if I can get the hang of that.

Can you tell I've forgotten to take my crazy pills on a regular basis this week?

Which reminds me...brb, dosing myself.

It's probably bad form to reward myself for taking my antidepressant by scooping myself a large bowl of ice cream, but I haven't had dinner yet and dairy is one of the four food groups or whatever stupid chart the USDA is using these days.  So screw it.

I know part of the problem is what time of year it is:  Pennsic season.  As usual, I won't be going this year, nor will I be able to go next year (since I'll still be in year-round school).  Pennsic 2014 (er, I think that's, what, Pennsic 44? 45?) will be the earliest I will be able to go, which makes me all sorts of sad.  It's hard to explain WHY it makes me so sad, except maybe for this post I made back in the day.  It's just...promises, you know?  And the prospect of meeting some of you on my f-list (assuming I could work up the courage to stop by and say hello -- being just an okay costumer means that some of you all are like rock stars to me...like expect me to get a little starry-eyed and maybe even choke up a little bit if I ever meet you) even if it is intimidating! 

Yes, yes, I know Pennsic will still  be there, but adopting from foster care means there are enormous levels of governmental interference in our lives for an unknown and unpredictable length of time, and I'd like to go to Pennsic before having to negotiate crossing state lines with a foster child, and all the headaches that come with dealing with a bureaucracy.  I'll be 36 in 2014.  And considering my late 30s is (IMO) getting Too Old for first-time motherhood (especially if we are blessed with smaller children), that means we are very limited to how many more years we can put off Pennsic without also hanging up our chances to become parents.

DO NOT WANT

Jul. 5th, 2012 11:43 pm
margotvankapelle: (bollocks)
I checked the weather forecast for the next couple of days and nearly fell over.

Al Gore?  You can have your freaking global warming back; we don't want it.

Okay, game plan is to hole up in my bedroom all day with the critters, since three of the five are elderly.  Any panting, heat exhaustion type symptoms and they go into a cool shower with me.

Voila, my plans for the weekend.




Note to self:  The next house will have central air.  This is ridiculous. 
margotvankapelle: (cheesegrater)
We were hit pretty hard -- about 3 PM yesterday that storm rolled through complete with green sky and horizontal rain. There was a tornado sighted in Allen County, and in all honesty, I have never seen such a large group of people with such a poor sense of self preservation and priorities as WalMart customers.

Naturally, the PERFECT place to shelter oneself during a tornado warning is in the frozen section -- you know, with all the glass doors? And the number of people I had to actively tell to please NOT bring their grocery carts into the shelter area of the store boggled my mind.

Anyway, the power is still out at my workplace; it's estimated that the power should be on by midnight Wednesday into Thursday. I had to collect the written cake orders due tomorrow and make them at the only Walmart in the city that still has power. We lost power at home, but it was restored rather quickly (4 AM) so we didn't lose any perishables. My folks are still without power, but they have a generator to keep their refrigerator and freezers running.

So it was less than fun.

http://journalgazette.net/article/20120630/LOCAL/306309990

http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=295491870546769&set=p.295491870546769&type=1&theater

This next one is actually a couple of streets over from where I live...

http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=10151075809111613&set=p.10151075809111613&type=1&theater
This one was about half an hour southeast of Fort Wayne:
http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=4185458921467&set=a.1847234347314.111988.1434344535&type=1&theater

ETA:  Have a pic gallery:http://www.indianasnewscenter.com/news/local/Severe-Weather-Blows-Through-Fort-Wayne-160870895.html?gallery=y&img=0&c=y

margotvankapelle: (internetforever)
Between work and school, I barely know which direction is up.  I really really want to sew, but can't really do that until the Tornado Room (so named because it's a disaster area) is cleared out -- I tried to clear it out myself, but my face broke out in hives and I began to wheeze about five minutes in.  Not good.  So I have to get The Spouse and The Daughter to do that for me...which means it might get done by the end of 2012.  If I'm lucky.

In other news, my sister Mel is driving up from Florida on a quick visit to drop my neice off with my parents for a portion of the summer.  Let's see if Bitz can learn to share Lennie this season.  Unfortunately, Mel is driving up on the weekend with the highest volume of cake sales for the year...Graduation Weekend for FWCS.  I tried to find a replacement (there's a coworker who doesn't normally work weekends), but apparently the only family that matters is the one this cow-irker has, not anyone else's.  Even after I explained that I haven't seen my sister in a couple of years.  I was delighted, let me tell you.  >:-/  So I'm going to have to call off one of the busiest sales days of the year and leave my coworker H screwed with no help.  H and I talked it over and we mutually decided that if I have to call off to see my sister, then Sunday would be the better day.  So that's the game plan.  At least 1 coworker is understanding.

Uh, other than that, school is going well.  One instructor has publicly stated on numerous occasions that she doesn't give A's ever...well guess what lady, you're going to have to change that stance.  *cracks knuckles*

I keep motivating myself by looking at real estate listings and home builders' websites.  Also looking at vehicles, since my poor Lumina will probably last me until I'm out of school (I hope!) but not much longer than that.  I'm kinda leaning in this direction, since that allows for some flexibility as far as cargo and stuff goes but is more fuel-efficient than an SUV or truck.  Or I'd like a Prius.  I'd like 40-odd mpg, you know?
margotvankapelle: (Default)
Did I mention that when I went to the doctor, my weight is up to 273?

Deeply unhappy about that.

Makes me want to crawl under a rock and never come back out.


Posted via m.livejournal.com.

margotvankapelle: (ooook)
I am one of those fools who enjoys swimming, even when the water is rather ridiculously cold.  I believe I've mentioned in the past that I like to swim at a local nature preserve, in their extraordinarily clear spring-fed lake -- a tiny one, but it's clean and relatively uncrowded.

Well, I went there after class, rolled up my scrub pants, stripped off my shoes and socks, and went wading for a glorious thirty minutes. Testing the water temperature, you see.  It was wonderful...the water temps weren't too bad, maybe in the low 60s?, even at 11 AM.  Enough justification for me to get my swim on, at any rate.  So next week I'll be back out there with my coworker/friend H, and we will have the first swim of the season. 
margotvankapelle: (internetforever)
Mental to-do list:

Today--
Make sure Boe mows the lawn
Clean litter boxes
Deep-clean living room
Type depression paper

Tomorrow--
Moar laundry
Clean out closet
Take closet leavings to Goodwill

Thursday--
Clean bathroom
Moar laundry

Friday--
Work on garden
margotvankapelle: (fridaylove)
Boe and I went out to a nice dinner (our weekly payday ritual) tonight, then he went off to the game store to play in his usual Friday evening Magic: The Gathering tournament.  There is something to be said for predictability.

It dawned on me, though, that I really don't have friends I hang out with or go and see on any regular basis...not since [livejournal.com profile] cubsfan57 and her husband Brian-sans-LJ moved to Kansas.  To be honest, it doesn't freak me out the way that it freaks Boe out.  Bless him, he worries that he's just up and leaving me all by my lonesome, in which I will pine away in sheer loneliness.  But I'm far more comfortable being alone than he can imagine -- remember, he has Massive Hangups Indeed when it comes to being by himself, and it is difficult for him to imagine any circumstances in which he is comfortable being by himself for any length of time.  I mean that.  When we were first married, he used to follow me around a ~500 square foot 1 bedroom apartment.   Mercifully, I broke him of that habit about the time we moved into our house.

So anyway.  Being by myself isn't the awful fate for me that Boe seems to think it is.  I'm a bit of an introvert (although a very social one) and being by myself gives me an opportunity to function without being "on".  It's something that I do with every single person -- including Boe.  I am constantly "on", and Friday evenings give me the chance to drop the personae* just a hair.  It's quite refreshing.  Besides which, I DON'T have friends I can just randomly visit, or invite myself over for a cup of coffee, or invite over to our place to get mauled by the dog enjoy some conversation.  I'm pretty much a hermit.  School, work, the internet.  That's my social life.  And that's okay.  Between the social anxiety and constant failure on my part to measure up to how awesome my internet friends are, I'm not sure I could handle meeting y'all in the first place!

Can't convince Boe of that, though.  He worries for my mental health...but him getting that job was the best thing to happen to my mental health since I was put on Wellbutrin. 


*I have several.  At school, I am The Pendantic Wunderkind, at work, the Helpful Bakery Associate, at home, the Practical and Sacrificing Spouse, and on the internet, the Occasionally Witty, Often Bitchy Costumer Who Likes To Talk About Herself. Hence this post.

margotvankapelle: (cake)
It's a tie between peppermint or lemon.  But please, not both at the same time....ew!  >.<  
margotvankapelle: (bigheadlittlearms)
Well, you all know how Fagan came to live with us, right?

Well, now we have met the canine version.

He is also black and white, a lab mix, we think.  He is clearly someone's pet -- he is neutered and has lovely house manners.  He does have some issues with his hips, which is pretty common with labs.  We've put a "found" notice on Craigslist, but no one has responded as yet.  If no one claims him, we'll have to take him to the pound...Mom made me promise that we wouldn't take in any more pets until after I'm done with school.


And man oh man the cats are pissed at us.
margotvankapelle: (beholdthenight)

Well, on Sunday I was on the northeast side of town at our local fail!Joann Fabrics, picking up fabric for a last-minute Halloween commission (one of my co-workers wanted to come to work as William Wallace in Braveheart), and my dad called me.  Now, for the record, Dad never calls me*, so when he does, I make quick in answering the phone.

"What's on fire?" he said.  Dad is not known for messing around when in phone conversation -- he hates talking on the things.  Typical guy, you know how it goes.

"Huh?  Nothing, so far as I'm aware.  What's going on?"

"Something near your house is on fire, and I was curious if you knew what was burning.  We're on our way to check it out -- it's pretty impressive."

"Uh, Dad, it's not my actual house, is it?"

Dad chuckled.  "No, it's not your house...I would have mentioned that right off the bat if it was your place."

"If that's the case, I'll join you in checking it out."

Well, he was absolutely correct.  It wasn't my house -- it was an insulation company within a half-mile of my house.  It was the largest fire I've seen in person in quite some time.  Dad and Bitz had been coming out of church on the northwest side of town when they saw the smoke plume, and Dad being Dad**, he was extremely interested in scoping the whole situation out.  He managed to find an exceptionally good vantage point across West Jefferson Boulevard, where I met up with them.  I sat in their car and Dad told me all about the tactics the different fire personnel were using, the difference between a variable-nozzle hose and a smooth-bore nozzle, his estimation of how many gallons of water per minute were being pumped, how modern bunker gear has evolved from what he used to use back in his firefighting days, some of the situations in which he was nearly killed, different attack techniques for different fire situations, and so on.  I'm sure Bitz was bored to tears, but I was fascinated***...I rarely get to hear tales of Dad's firefighting experiences and I was so young when he was on the fire department I can't really remember it****. 

I told Dad that one day soon, I plan to schedule a day for just the two of us to sit down with a tape recorder and let him go on about his firefighting experiences.  I'd like to transcribe those recordings and make copies of both the voice recording and the transcription to give to the local Firefighter's Museum, the Smithsonian, and the Library of Congress.  While the latter two will undoubtedly stick the recordings and transcripts somewhere in their basements, someone somewhere might eventually do research on a really nifty transitional time in the history of American firefighting and might find Dad's oral history useful.



*I think the last time Dad called me was in 2009 when we were coordinating travel for my brother's wedding.

**Dad was on the New Haven, Indiana volunteer fire department back from the late 1970s until the late 1980s, so he was on the department while it transitioned from a small VFD to combined FD/EMS service and the study of fire science really started to make headway.  By the time he retired from the FD, he was their photographer and arson investigator in addition to his other duties on the FD.

***I cheerfully admit that I adore and hero-worship my dad to the point that if he asked me to jump off a cliff, I'd do it, no questions asked. 

****Let me put it this way...I was young enough for most of his FD service that I remember imagining that Dad's bunker pants would suddenly start walking on their own a la Bedknobs and Broomsticks.

WTF?

Oct. 12th, 2011 12:10 am
margotvankapelle: (beaker)
Ok, I must hormonal or something, because my brain is all "BABIES!!!!!!"

*sigh*

In other news, I have the sudden urge to make a rockin' circuspunk outfit based on several circus advertisements I saw when flipping through one of Boe's circus history books this evening.
margotvankapelle: (ooooooo)

So to recap:

Random Gamer Guy is gone...but not before stealing a pack of Magic: The Gathering cards Boe had picked up that Friday.  I don't care too much, except Boe is unhappy, and that makes me unhappy.

Boe's temp job is finished up, and now we wait to hear from the agency for another assignment.

I might have tied one on last Friday to celebrate Random Gamer Guy's departure; the hangover served to remind me that I am not as young as I once was, and that my liver hates me.

Boe and I held a little backyard barbecue on Saturday.  Everything was delicious and (as is par the course for me) since I bought too much food, we'll be eating burgers and hot dogs the rest of the week.  But they are delicious, and that's the important part.

My college's financial aid office is screwing around with me, and I don't like it.  My account has been flagged for verification Every. Single. Year. and this year was no exception.  I turned in copies of my tax return on July 18, and my account is STILL "pending, under review."  This means that they have not released my financial aid to the bookstore so I can get my books.  Because school starts in a week, I'm sure all of the used copies of the textbooks have been sold, so I'll either need to rent textbooks (which is what I'm considering) or buy brand new ones.  I am tempted to go to the financial aid office tomorrow and break some heads.

And the only paperwork I'm waiting on to complete my nursing program applications (yes, two:  one for the LPN program and one for the RN program) is my highschool transcripts.  I called my alma mater a week ago Tuesday to request 2 sets of official transcripts.  The said they'd be in the mail that same day.  I should have recieved them by Wednesday.  They are still not here.  I am tempted to go down there and break some heads too.

I am so excited at the prospect of being able to work on sewing projects!
margotvankapelle: (clowns will eat)

So.

Because I was a little antsy, a little bored this evening, I decided to scope out my area's real estate listings.  And I found   this.  Yep, it needs work, no doubt about it.  BUT.  It has 5 bedrooms.  That's a lot of room.  AND.  It's in the suburb in which I grew up, which is quite possibly the safest place on the planet.  AND.  The schools are good (I should know -- I went there!).  AND.  We'd have a garage.  I've never had a garage before.  Hell, never had a driveway before.  AND.  Look at the price.  I mean, LOOK at the price.  That price right there?  If Boe and I bought that house, and rented out our current one, the rent from the one we're in now would cover both mortgage payments and then some.  I'm not afraid of sweat equity.  We could do this.  We could do this, and then we wouldn't have to move at all after I'm done with school, and we could adopt at that point without having to juggle a move in the middle of all of it. 

It's insane, I know.  But it's possible.

ETA:  Well, poop.  I re-read the description, and under Notes it reads, "Repair foundation and plumbing."  There is no way in hell I am buying a house that requires foundation work.  Oh well, another pipe dream up in smoke.
margotvankapelle: (housekeeper from hell)

Here's what I had planned to get done today:

Clean the bathroom (Yes, with RGG in the house I use medical-grade latex gloves, no worries, darlings!)

Get 5 loads of laundry done

Clean the bedroom

Here's what I actually accomplished:

Threw 1 load of clothes into the washer (in my defense, the cats had soaked some articles of clothing in that particular load, so I had to run it twice with a bunch of white vinegar to get the smell completely out)

Whined about not being able to go to Pennsic as usual this year

Figured out Pennsic tentage for NEXT year (it has crossed my mind that I am either the poster child for the adage "Hope springs eternal" or for the one that goes "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result."  Not sure which one applies, I'll let y'all come to your own conclusions.)

Watched The Steve Wilkos Show -- OK, I admit it, I like the trainwreckiness of trash talk shows.

Aaaaaaaaand that's about it.
margotvankapelle: (ooooooo)

If you buy a Frosty of any kind this weekend from Wendy's, they will contribute 50 cents to the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.  The Foundation works very very hard to find children in the foster care system permanent, loving homes, and specializes in the "hard-to-place" kids.  Kids who are older than 6 or 7, kids with emotional problems from the amount of trauma they have suffered, minority children, children with physical disabilities or mental impairments.  They also focus on the children who have been waiting the longest to be matched with a safe, stable, loving family.  Aging out of the system is hell...yet 20,000 to 30,000 children age out of the system every year.  The statistics are grim with regards to their futures.

Kids who need a home desperately.

Please, f-list, buy a Frosty this weekend. Help kids find their way home.



In addition, "like" this page on Facebook or tweet the link on Twitter, and Wendy's will contribute an additional 50 cents to the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.
margotvankapelle: (ooooooh)
I swear, no slushie tastes quite as good as the First Slushie of the Season.  When it gets over 80 degrees out, my appetite totally disappears. So I tend to survive summer sans air conditioning by living off of freezer pops and slushies.

Today's is strawberry.

<3
margotvankapelle: (ooooooh)
First of all, we needed a new mower. So while we were at the store, we also picked up:

A cat statue to put on Fagan's grave (it's been almost a year since he passed, after all, I think it's about time!)

An invisible dog fence for Miss Maggie...I let her out yesterday to potty, and 30 seconds later I get a phone call from our neighbors across the street. Maggie had decided to run out into traffic in order to visit them. *sigh*

Roundup herbicide -- we're killing off the lawn and starting over

Grass seed

Weed and feed

Grub killer

2 large planters

A small planter

A hanging planter

10 begonias

16 pansies

8 petunias

and

2 fuschias

I have spent the afternoon planting to my heart's content. Boe has been spraying herbicide on everything in our yard (I did make sure to cover the lilac bush and the sole remaining rose bush before he started in on the herbicide), and we've been burning handfuls of leaves mixed in with a little bit of firewood. That way we don't get nailed for burning leaves in city limits. A handful at a time is enough to tell anyone who asks that we're using it as tinder. Not nearly as smoky, either.

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