Jealous

May. 5th, 2009 08:09 am
margotvankapelle: (crymeariver)
I've been following the Costume Con pictures on my flist, and i am jealous.

I wanna go!   /whine


(Of course, what on earth would I *wear*?  I don't have *anything* that's nearly that level of workmanship...I feel kinda lost in costuming.  I don't have a buddy to say, "Yeah, that looks great!" or , "Oh, honey, no."  Just me and my hopes and my knowledge that I am not as good as The Rest of Them Are no matter what I do.   Pride and insecurity, the twin stars around which my ego orbits! )
margotvankapelle: (brainz)
I was off work last night, and my neice was in town, so my stepmom invited me over to spend some time.  It was awesome.  (Aunty Krista also gave Elena her first pair of real ballet shoes...she wore them all day!)  I had a lot of fun, but I hadn't been to bed yet that day, so I went home.  I remember tucking a pillow behind my neck as I sat on the couch...

Boe shook me awake at some point and told me to go to bed.  So I did.  And when he got up this morning and was walking out of the bedroom, I opened my eyes and told him that I love him.  And he just looked at me and closed the door.

I am slightly paranoid about this sort of behavior.  After the temper tantrum he threw a couple of weeks ago about how I never spend time with him (because I'm visiting my family WTF?!), I am really tired of it.  So I don't look forward to what this evening's pre-work discussion turns into.

The only other thing I could think of is that he thought I was going to do a shitload of housecleaning while he was gone. Erm, no.  He's the one who dirtied the dishes,. therefore, he gets to clean them.  I did three or four loads of laundry and that may not have been enough to make a difference in Boe's world.

Edited, 4:12 pm EDT:  I talked with Boe on the phone and everything's good.  Boe gave me this face O_o over the phone and sounded very confused when I brought it up.  He said, "I came back in [to our room] about 5 minutes later and kissed you and told you that I love you.  Did you forget that?"

Well, yes, I guess I did.  I may have been in that half-asleep state where I can still hold a conversation but not really be conscious.  So it looks like I overreacted this morning. *facepalm*

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